Month: October 2021

I’m scared to die. I think about death a lot of times. It’s like the thought of my mortality comes up randomly during the day. Days I be scared of the afterlife not knowing if I’ll be good enough to fit into heaven or evil enough to survive hell. These are places they say everybody are suppose to spend eternity. Don’t know if I believe it too much. It be days I think about not being able to accomplish my goals and aspirations. Or even just losing everything I own. I seen the meme of the U-Haul not following the hearse. Then it’s days I think I might be a light in people life. So if I die they might be overwhelmed by darkness. Selfish of me to think that way. Death gives me a fear that shakes my soul. Death will come. I know because I’m a warrior, and death is guarantee for warriors. I just ask myself when I face death that I smile. Just to let death know that it is an honor and I am happy to be here. So don’t get mad at me for fighting to live when you think it is me living to fight.

I be feeling like I be fumbling the opportunities and blessings from God. Saying this because I see opportunities I want all the time, and yet, I be unprepared for them. When I pray it sound as if I sure am ready. Not going to trip off miss opportunities. It tells me is that I got to be better prepared.

All this because I seen a bronze beauty today that I wasn’t ready to put the Mack down on. I’m with Bun B, and promising never to leave the house without my pimping again. I did not have no conversation but I wanted to talk to her. Get to know her privately. This a big city so the odds of me running into this bronze beauty again are slim. I seen her trying to catch the train. She was noticeable because her friend noticed me first.  I felt eyes on me. I look around and seen two chicks with one looking at me. This was the friend of the bronze beauty looking at me. The friend said something to the bronze beauty. “Girl, look at this fine piece of man walking towards us. One look gonna have you dripping with excitement.” She didn’t say that. Don’t have a single clue what she said to make bronze beauty look. I just know when bronze beauty looked at me I felt she wanted me. Just another one of them missed opportunities.

Lately I’ve been watching a show called Tokyo Revengers. It’s about a boy name Takemitchi who is a social loser. When he thinks he dies in a freak accident he goes back in time to change his present. Dope story to me. Sometimes I wish I can go back to being a kid again too. It reminds me of a Big KRIT song. Then you realize you can neva go back but it a be cool to see.

This is like my war journal. My war journal post is to keep you updated on my business and me. I’m treating business like war and I am the commander of my army. Been hearing that business students read the Art of War by Sun Tzu as recommended reading. That tells me that business takes the strategy and tactic of an army general. Also, I am a student of warfare. Constantly I look for ways to make myself a better tactician and stategist. Don’t get me wrong I am an amateur to war. I’ve only experienced it through media. Plus I’m learning what is the meaning of being a true warrior. I’m here to build an empire with my business with me as the head. So if I will fight for the success of my company and Negus is at the top.